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s2smodern

Every child is so naive when he dreams about his future. And so was I, when I imagined myself exploring the world or as a missionary in Africa. All this contrasted with my reserved character and the small world of Sardinia, the island where I was born and of which I am so fond. I lived the traditional way as a young boy: school, catechism, the sacraments, but I also had a desire for truth and for deep relationships. And so, as I grew up, I changed from "dreamer" to "lawyer of lost cases", affectionately defined, as my concept was that sensitivity towards the most vulnerable and the sense of justice that I cultivated was a beautiful value but something that couldn’t be put into practice in concrete reality.

I studied Jurisprudence, more as a second-best solution rather than by choice and, in the meantime, I met the groups linked to the Jesuits, with whom I began a journey of human and faith maturity. There I found space to share and experience that desire for deeper friendships, renew my traditional and formal faith, learning also what affect the Gospel has on my life, and experiencing ways of giving service which in reality were still unknown to me at the time. The Astalli Center in Rome, which hosts refugees from Ethiopia comes to my mind: here it was possible to experience that across border encounter that I had always dreamed of! And during those years, during one of these experiences, I met two novices, species I had never met before but who opened up a new world to me, because I realized there were other possibilities of a state of life besides marriage. I therefore embarked on a time of experimentation which lasted almost ten years, where I continued my journey with the CLC Community to which I belonged with an even greater commitment. I did a retreat every year and was accompanied by a guide during the experience of the spiritual exercises.  I was in charge of a youth group. In recent years I was preparing to become a guide of the Ignatian Retreat.  This was the type of life I had been searching for.  In my everyday life I sometimes experienced a distressing restlessness, because I could not find prospects of work that would give me peace, allow me to live the values ​​that were close to my heart and in the most radical way that I desired. I was unable to make up my mind and I was looking for compromising solutions, as it made more sense to me to put into practice the legal studies which I had by now completed and which cost me a lot of effort.

But while I was preparing for public competitive examinations for the judiciary, during a time when I was more at peace, the Lord gave me His word, during a school camp for young people: "Do not be afraid, I will be with you, you belong to me" ( cf Is 43: 1-6). In a few minutes I understood what I had experienced in previous years and from then on, I never doubted again. It was the call to follow Him and the choice for a concrete way of life was pointing towards the Jesuits and their spirituality which had also become my spirituality.

I entered the novitiate in 1994, so glad of having finally fulfilled my childhood dream and my desire to spend my life closer to those on the periphery. After years of formation my mission in Albania was a gift, a fulfilment of that desire that had such distant roots. This is all God's timing ... and the necessary journey to arrive there. I have learnt so much from the eight Albanians of the community; The not so simple language and the new culture have been a great challenge; I was immersed in a human element that overcame me and made me acknowledge that I had finally found that dimension of life that I had always sought.

Then I was asked to leave everything and offer a delicate and important service to the Society as a master of novices. It took me a lot of effort to leave everything, but I was so grateful for having fulfilled my desire and for an experience that has really matured me as a man and in my understanding of the priesthood.

This is how the Lord works, always introducing new challenges. And this is our charism, to be available to go where there is the greatest need.  In this vocation of being a pilgrim today I find my roots and desires for the future.

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s2smodern